We are already in the middle February and I swear yesterday it was the beginning of summer 2018 – Where has the time gone?!

Since I haven’t kept up to date here much, this week I wanted to update you on my life lately; and the rollercoaster it has been. I finally feel like I am settling down again, and am getting comfortable in my home, the home that I have changed drastically in the last month. But that’s getting ahead of myself; for a proper update, I need to actually backtrack briefly to the end of last summer…

Summer really did fly by, I picked up my camera and I started falling in love with photography again. It spurred my series of Fortnightly Photos that I posted here, though keeping them fortnightly towards the end proved harder than I had hoped. I have stopped that project now for a while, but have by no means put down the camera. As my joy with photography set off, I decided to offer it professionally – outdoor family/children’s portrait photography mostly, but I have been studying and learning about working within studio settings too, as well as abstract photography, travel and much more. I am not busy within this small business, but I love it, and I know that if it is meant to be, then clients will come. As long as I can provide the service with a genuine love for capturing people, then I will be happy to continue.

While doing this, I continued my online studying and by Christmas I had qualified with Warrior’s at Ease as a Level 1 Trauma Sensitive Yoga teacher to work within military communities. It is something I am extremely excited about offering in the near future but I am not quite there yet.

Moving back to Scotland, permanently this time was exciting and difficult. There was a lot of learning for H and I because we needed to find a balance between work, parenting, our marriage and having our own down time. There were many great moments and many fights, we aren’t perfect but after being apart so long, we both knew it would be hard work. Now, he’s on patrol, and won’t be back for some weeks yet, so we will have to go backwards a bit, and get used to life together again.

We knew he was going, so I went home to my parents for Christmas and he went off to find Nemo!

Then the fun bit came… we went to a family wedding in Jakarta.

35 hours on 3 different flights, my parents, brother, cousin and 17 month old son made the trip. Poor Theo (my son) has been on more flights in his life than I think he’d ever care to think about! He is an absolute trooper. We arrived and he wasn’t well, and progressively got worse over 4 days before we took him to A&E and got admitted to hospital. We missed our flight(s) home and got back 8 days later, safe and healthy. It was scary but we survived, and a week later were home in Scotland!

Talk about a well-travelled child! He has been to 2 continents, 7 countries, 19 cities/towns and lived in 3 different homes with his 18 month lifespan. He really is an absolute star.

Now, it’s been a month since we flew back to our home in Scotland and even this month has been full of craziness. We’ve had sick days and outing days, we’ve gone to soft-play and the park, we’ve done lots of shopping (food included) and we have climbed the walls because of bad weather. We’ve done painting and gone on food strike, we’ve attempted to stop nursing and given up because Theo cried so much it broke my heart. Finally, I am starting to feel like life is falling into place just the way it should be – right in time for Theo Prana to get used to things and then daddy will come home (though god knows when that’ll be) and shake things up again.

The house has been changed completely. Every room is different but it works better now: it makes more practical sense. I think H will be really shocked initially but hopefully will see how the changes are of benefit for him too. Theo Prana is growing and challenging me daily, he keeps me busy and teaches me about the really important things in life, like how to laugh and smile and de-stress even in the toughest situations. Being mum and dad and everyone in-between is hard work, but I know that if I find thing tough, he must find them even harder. At least I can rationalise with myself, and comfort myself, but he still relies on me, so I need to be strong for him. Yes it can be hard, yes, it means there are many rollercoaster moments almost every day, but with all the changes, I am a steady force for my son, and at least he knows that I will always show up for him.

I’m starting to think things will never slow down now. I am grateful to have a good friend here and support from my family and my in-laws while we plod on. I am grateful for social media, and video calls, and the internet allowing me to keep in touch with everyone. I am also grateful for this blog, because even after a break away, it is still my safe space to write and share about our life. Having a toddler is the most rewarding thing in my world right now. He is strong willed and fiesty and I love him for it every day, but it makes for an incredibly difficult job, so between crèche, attempting naps, making sure there is real, cooked food to eat and joining in with lots of play, life lately has been incredibly busy.

Until next time,

xox

R